When a New Mother Says ‘I Can’t Take It Anymore’, Here’s What Her Family Should Do

What Happened

Anjani Mishra, who served in the Indian Air Force, transitioned to full-time motherhood after leaving the service. She was diagnosed with clinical depression and began experiencing extreme sleep deprivation, with sleep reduced to about two hours per night. She notes that the shift from a structured military role to home life altered her experience of motherhood, particularly around breastfeeding and the pressure to meet high standards. She is described as now working as a life coach, guiding mothers who feel overwhelmed or unable to cope. On World Suicide Prevention Day, she shared a message through The Better India about the importance of addressing a new mother's mental health early and not treating it as an afterthought. The report highlights that motherhood brings physical and emotional demands, including sleep loss, hormonal changes, breastfeeding challenges, and recovery from childbirth. Persistent mood or behavior changes warrant closer attention rather than being dismissed as typical postnatal experience. A mother’s statements about not wanting to live or not being able to continue should prompt immediate medical attention and support from family.

Why It Matters

The piece emphasizes that postpartum mental health can significantly affect both mother and child if left unaddressed. It cites World Health Organization estimates of postpartum depression affecting about 13% of women globally, rising to around 20% in developing countries, with severe distress potentially leading to self-harm or suicide. In India, a systematic review covering more than 20,000 women found a 22% pooled prevalence of postpartum depression and identified risk factors such as financial difficulties, domestic violence, prior psychiatric illness, marital conflict, and lack of spousal support. These figures underline the scale of the issue and the need for family-based support and timely clinical intervention.

Background

The article frames the transition to motherhood as a physically and emotionally demanding period, where sleep deprivation, hormonal shifts, breastfeeding issues, pain, and caregiving responsibilities can compound stress. It notes that warning signs may be subtle at first, including withdrawal from social contact, irritability, or decreased desire to interact with the baby. The guidance aims to normalize seeking help and reinforces a supportive family role.

Key Facts

• Anjani Mishra left the Indian Air Force to become a full-time mother and was later diagnosed with clinical depression.
• Her sleep decreased to roughly two hours per night at times during the challenging period after childbirth.
• The World Health Organization estimates postpartum depression affects about 13% of women globally; about 20% in developing countries.
• In India, a systematic review of 38 studies with over 20,000 participants found a pooled postpartum depression prevalence of 22%.
• Risk factors noted in the Indian study include financial difficulties, domestic violence, prior psychiatric illness, marital conflict, and lack of husband support.
• Families are advised to provide practical support—food, rest, sleep, and company—and to respond without blaming the mother when warning signs appear.
• Statements like “I don’t want to live” or “I can’t take it anymore” should trigger immediate medical attention and intervention.
• Anjani is described as a life coach who works with mothers who feel overwhelmed or unable to cope.

What Happens Next

The reported guidance is for families to acknowledge early warning signs, offer practical support, and seek medical help promptly when serious statements or behavior changes occur. The emphasis is on avoiding judgment and ensuring continuous care and support for both mother and child. The narrative links these actions to World Suicide Prevention Day messaging and ongoing advocacy for better maternal mental health care in India and beyond.